Tuesday, February 23, 2016

The Day I Gave Away My Rings

So I have been waiting to share this post for a number of reasons...but I think it is finally time.  It's a new year with a fresh start and I am not wallowing in my despair anymore.  Some people may take great angst in this post, and I may get some pity, but the reason I am writing it is because I want to have a record of what living in Hong Kong meant to us...our experiences, our feelings, our ups and our downs.  So this doozy of a story needs to be included:)

I have been able to play tennis since moving here and it has brought me a great competitive outlet...as well as great exercise.  I noticed a couple months ago that my rings were starting to give me some callouses.  Now I only wear three rings...my wedding ring, my engagement ring, and a ring that my husband gave me for my 21st birthday.  They are all very significant and I have been wearing them all for almost 20 years.

Because of the callouses, I started to take my rings off and leave them at home before tennis.  Sometimes I would forget to do so before I left, so they would go in my change purse in my wallet...thinking that I always have my wallet and never use my change.

On October 30th, I had a very busy day.  I ran from my tennis lesson to home for a quick shower, then to the school where we had parent/teacher conferences.  In fact, I was so stressed to get there on time...because who wants to be late to the first of 16 conferences...that I ended up getting a speeding ticket, sent to me later in the mail:)

Andy met me at the school and we made it through all the conferences.  As usual, we made a date night out of it and drove into the city.  Driving to and parking at the IFC is relatively new in our repertoire of comfortable places, so it was fun to practice. We didn't have a reservation, but were both very hungry.  As we walked from the garage to the escalators in Soho, there are lots of areas where homeless sit and ask for money. Many times I dont think about it...or the questions of "are they really in need" or "what will they use it for" prevent me from giving, but this time was different.  I had just had a conversation with a friend who had been convicted about spending more money on her coffee than giving to the people she was passing by.  Immediately, I stopped, and almost without thinking, grabbed a handful of change out of my change purse and gave to the woman on the corner.  I made a point of looking at her face, wanting to make a connection, and only looked down briefly at her little hat she was using to  collect so I didn't miss the mark.  Andy just looked at me in a funny way, and I told him that something struck me to do it and i wanted to be obedient.  Then we hurried to the escalators, found Pottinger street for some last minute halloween costume shopping (wigs for our children's Inside Out costumes), and then found an Italian restaurant that was delicious.  When we were done, we strolled back to the car, not really in a hurry, but with a purpose because we were both tired.

Fast forward to Sunday morning...we were coming home from church and I was sitting in the second row since Ben (our house mate) was in the car.  As we were about to drop him off at University MTR station, I realized I didn't have my rings on and opened my purse to go into my change purse.  Before I even unzipped the change purse, PANIC STRUCK! I quickly poured into my hand all the change that was in the purse.  As I had dreaded...my wedding ring and engagement ring were gone.  Silver lining...my special 21st birthday present from my then, fiancé, was stuck in the corner of the purse.

Suddenly, the enormity of what just happened hit like a ton of bricks and tears started to well up in my eyes.  Unfortunately, I was in direct eye sight of my husband, the driver, when he used his mirror, so I quickly pulled out a book and started to read to Sarah, seated next to me.  Abby was on my other side, and sometime before we got home she asked why I was crying.  I told her there was something in my eyes.  But as soon as we got home, I went into our bedroom, closed the door behind Andy, and told him what had happened.  His first response was, "What??" But he quickly circled his arms around me and let me cry.  Then we talked about me going back down there to see if I could find the same woman.  It was a long shot, but he thought that I would regret it if I didn't, and I felt that I owed it to him.

I headed down on the train, in no condition to drive, and made it down in record time.  I listened to a podcast on generosity:) When I got to the same spot the woman had been, she was still there! Although, I wasn't 100% it was the same woman, but she looked very similar and was in the same place.  When I went to talk to her, we had a severe language barrier.  I decided to call a friend who could speak Chinese.  When I finally got a hold of her and walked back to the women, she was gone.

By the time I got home, I had stopped crying and Andy had told the kids what had happened.  They had drawn me signs and told me they were praying for me that I would get my rings back...it was incredibly sweet and healing.

I decided to go back the next night with a friend who could speak Cantonese and Mandarin.  Soda is a fellow YL leader and was incredibly gracious to take the time to help.  When we got to the same spot, there was a woman there.  Again, I wasn't 100% sure she was the same woman, but Soda talked to her anyway.  The woman told Soda that she didn't have the rings...that if she had been given rings she would have given them back.  I was discouraged, but Soda was upbeat and encouraged me to keep looking.  We talked to five other women that night.  It was such a sweet witness to see Soda bent down to talk to these women...some more responsive than others.  She was so gentle with them, it was true beauty.

I never did find that woman, or my rings.  While they had extreme emotional value...and financial value...the Lord has given me some perspective.  I'm not sure what the lesson is except not to take off your rings, but I am trusting that those rings were used by God:)

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