It's hardest living overseas when...

Let me first preface this blog by saying it may sound like a pity party.  I guess that would be fair.  I have just found myself in "the perfect storm." Overall, I really enjoy living in Hong Kong.  But I knew going in that the hardest part for me would be missing home...my friends and family. I guess that is obvious.  And I also knew that another factor to that is time does not stand still.  Just as I am living life and changing because of it, so are those that I love on the other side of the world.  Well, today marks the extreme of this changing.

I have one very good friend who is having a baby today...and I have one very good friend who is in the process of losing her baby.  Both were expected.  It is times like this that I just ache to be home. While I would love to be there to meet that newborn face and congratulate my friend in person, I knew that waiting until that little girl is a few months is one of the sacrifices I was prepared to make for this move.  It's the other life altering event taking place that I'm having a hard time getting a grip on.  I knew that it was a very real possibility that I would never see that sweet little five year old face again this side of heaven, in the back of my mind I thought I would get to kiss her one more time this summer.  That still may be true.  She has certainly surprised us before and surpassed expectations.  But even if that were true, knowing what that family is going through and not being able to be there is heart wrenching. Having walked with them through this for the first 3 1/2 years, I have invested a lot of "blood, sweat and tears...and prayers." Now it looks as if their journey is almost over and their broken hearts scream to me across the miles.  And I am stuck in the predicament where all I can do is pray.  But isn't that the most I should be doing? It doesn't feel like it.

So now it's just a matter of offering my emotions, my concerns and most importantly, their circumstances to Our Heavenly Father.  This is not about me...it's ultimately about Him.  His timing is perfect, His peace is perfect, and He comforts the brokenhearted.  I am determined that as this all plays out, I will trust in His promises, His complete sovereignty, and His love for us. Again, sorry for the pity-party.  Sometimes writing things down makes you feel better and it is easier to process:)